A Death in the Family

By Father Mack
(a.k.a.: Father Larry David McCormick)
Line drawings by Mrs. Gertrud Mueller Nelson

What do we owe to all the honest horses? It is here that I propose to begin what I have called a “primer” on the uncomfortable topic of death and dying. It is, I point out, only a beginning. I invite (and I hope to receive) contributions from many of the eyes that are now scanning my words so that together we can do justice to our four-legged coworkers as they near their journeys’ end.

• Death will come for us all, that is a given, but none of us can foretell when the grim reaper will seek us out. The same is true of our horse partners. Given that reality, where will you or I be when death arrives at our horse’s stall? God forbid that an owner cannot be contacted when a barn manager or a veterinarian determines that a horse must be euthanized. Do we need “durable power of attorney” arrangements with our barns to permit such an agonizing decision in our absence?

• If we are involved in the torturous choice of whether to continue treatment of a seriously ill horse, when and how do we make the call to humanely end this creature’s earthly existence? I do not want to create a Second Life scenario, but each of us has a circle of sensitive friends with whom we could talk through possible courses of action. Is it not better to do so now rather than when our emotions are roiling after a call from the stable?

• When we do lose a friend such as Greta, is there an appropriate manner by which we may share the heart wrenching decisions that had to be made with our friends and others who own and love horses? Without being maudlin, how may we assist those who will someday face similar situations?

• When our friend has died, how do we achieve what is popularly called “closure”? Here I have a suggestion to make. It is a generic version of the prayer I crafted for use within the blessing of Cesar Parra’s barn, “Prayer at the Death of Our Horse.” I present it for your personal use and will be interested in refinements/variations you may make upon it.

With serious and solemn prayers (if you don’t much fancy prayers, then make it “best wishes”) that none of our equine pals or us have to face this last enemy, death, anytime soon, here is my prayer for a horse chum who has died. Feel free to fill in the names of Greta and Donovan and Galant du Serein the first time you read through this prayer. Their owners will appreciate knowing that their horses are kindly remembered.

Heavenly Father, to those who have never had a horse this prayer will sound strange, but to you, Lord of all life and Creator of all creatures, it will be intelligible. Our hearts are heavy as we face the loss of our beloved _______________ who was so much a part of our lives. This creature of yours made our lives more enjoyable and gave us cause to laugh and to find joy in his/her company. We remember the fidelity and the joy of this friend and will miss his/her presence in our lives. From him/her we learned many lessons such as naturalness and the unembarrassed request for affection. In caring for his/her daily needs, we were taken up and out of our own self-needs and, thus, learned to serve another. Grant that the death of this friend of yours remind us that death comes to us all, animal and human, and that it is the natural passage for all life. May _______________ sleep on in an eternal slumber in your Fatherly care as all creation awaits the fullness of Jesus’ appearing. Amen.